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College/Football/Halloween

  It's been so long since I have updated my viewers on this journey of college. I woke up this morning thinking about my priorities and I realized I've been neglecting one of my favorite projects; Blogging.  Then I thought, what's a better way to update them then with my weekend college festivities.

  College is really fun and It has it's ups and downs but for the most part it is fun. You can easily be someone who is strictly about business or you can be someone who likes to have lots of fun. I feel like I fall right in the middle. I probably go out once a month and every single time I go out I regret even going out. I mean honestly I only go out to get pretty. This is all about to stop though, I've realized that the parties will always be there to enjoy. I'd much rather be about my business right now.

 This weekend University Michigan beat us by like 1 , Just kidding they beat us by a lot, hahah. I'm not sure why, but our team isn't performing well this season. Faith is still high and I love how our spartan fans still support the team in a dying season. Our tailgate was SO fun! All of the U of M and MSU people came together and it was actually the most fun I've had here. Watching the greeks steeping and the African American students sticking together. It was a great scene.

After the police came and shut us down, SAD FACE, I went home and tried to reenergize in my bed. I couldn't sleep really at all. After a few hours of laying down, I started to get dressed. I didn't really have a costume so I just dressed over the top. We had a lot of fun getting dressed. I did my roommates make up and she was a fierce lion. After that we headed to a custom party and It was not fun then we headed to another party and It wasn't that fun either! At least at this party there were a lot of people that I knew so I was able to mingle with my people. We ended up ending our night pretty early. I really believe that I can not hang. I can't imagine being up until 4 am. Like thats not healthy LOL. I guess this isn't my typical Saturday but some thing good to get my online Journal/Blog started.

Happy Pre-Halloween ! ( I think I spelled that right )

GRWM- COLLEGE FRESHMAN EDITION

Hair Chop

My first night in college

  Honestly, College is super boring and I miss my family. Just joking it's only my second day and I'm loving it. I know my last post " Five reasons why I'm ready to go to school", I explained how much I was ready to leave and I was able to move in earlier then the typical freshman which was fun. I've really just been exploring and finding my way around this HUGE place. If you're new to my blog, I attend Michigan State University. Its a very big university located in Michigan. But any way, Yeah I love it up here. Yesterday I moved in with international students. Mostly asian in my dorm hall. Ya know I never noticed how fashionable the asian culture is. They are very trendy!!! It was interesting to talk to the people who aren't from America.
  So after I moved in yesterday, I took some time to get my mind together. I think that this is very essential when you're moving to a new place. I put on some very calming music and gathered my thoughts. I would also recommend moving in early; no traffic, you don't have to worry about your roommates family and your family being secluded in such tight space, and you can be alone for a night. I'm really happy I was chosen for this opportunity. I decided to take a walk around campus when the sun started to set and sat by the river and it was beautiful.
 It's kind of hitting me that I am up here alone.... I have this one guy I'm getting to know and he is up here and a few mentors but other than that I feel kind've foreign. I like the feeling though. Finding everything on my own and teaching myself how to depend on myself.
  I started off today at the gym around 8AM and wrapped that up around 10AM... Then I did some research about Apple products and decided I wanted the new mac book pro. I went along and purchased one. The people at the MSU computer shop were really helpful and I was excited because I received free wireless beats with my purchase. This computer is really nice and I'm happy about my purchase. I mean 1,400 is a lot but it's worth it if you have the money to spend. Then I headed back to my dorm and called my bestfriend who goes to college in Atlanta. We have been talking in college way more than high school which seems backwards but I mean i'm not complaining. After we politicked for an hour or so I spent some time playing with photoshop on my computer, that was different. Then I sluggishly went to a 2 hour meeting for my job, that was SUPER FUN. Lastly, enjoyed a long walk to Chipotle and It was worth every mile. Now I am enjoying the beautiful scenery in the middle of campus. Its a vibrant ray of sun shining west of us, looks like its preparing for a 8pm sun set. Some beautiful flowers and cool summer evening breeze. Times like this I very much treasure. It'll be snowing tomorrow. hahahaha.....

-lanaylove

5 Reasons why I'm ready for school to start

 If you don't know then you soon will! This summer I will be attending the illustrious Michigan state University!!! I will be the first in my family to attend college and I also have a full ride!!

I am beyond proud of myself!! I would just like share a few reasons why I am super excited about attending a great university this fall.

  1. OPPORTUNITY  

I am attending a school FILLED with great opportunities to be successful. Everyday I m receiving new letters about the different on campus resources! Going into a very competitive field I will have to be on all of my toes at all times and taking advantage of all on campus opportunities.

   2. NETWORKING 

I will be surrounded by NEW great people every single day. I am so happy that Michigan state university is not a small  university. I will be able to find great people and every frills and meet people who can truly help my career and I know I can help them as well.

   3. FREEDOM

I never had very strict parents but there is nothing like being a complete adult. I am in charge of my bills, I am paying for my own school, and I am responsible for myself. This has to be one of my most exciting things about moving away from home. It seems like being eighteen everyone wants you to still abide by their youth rules but want you to hold yourself as an adult. To stay away from that I am moving away! If anything goes wrong I will have to blame myself and revive quickly! 

    4. New friends 

I plan on meeting many new people! I already have two room mates who I don't know and it's exciting to me them. My other room mate is one of my great friends who I'm also excited about getting to know better. I can finally find friends who are completely interested in the same things as me! I love media, blogging, art, music, love, YouTube , traveling, creative directing,  decorating, inspirational speaking, church, and broadcast journalism!! I know I'll find great people who love tear things as well. 

5. Stronger Relationship with God 

What better time to build your spiritual life than in college when you're completely on your own. No more being forced to go to church every Sunday or bible schools you have to do it all on your own, it's your choice. I plan on building up and staying strong with him. I deserve to be spiritually focused and stirred into the right direction. I want to be very intact with God. I hope I find a good church in east Lansing.

Lanay Loves going YOUTUBE!!!!!!

  It's been a long time of thought, doubt, and more thoughts. I've been wanting to  do YouTube videos since middle school and now I'm going to college and I've grown some gutts to follow my heart! Watching YouTube, the different personalities, races, people, or attitudes is both inspiring and discouraging. You see some people who are very good at YouTube, best cameras, high tech lighting, and they are "ON". You think they woke up being perfect or having the perfect ideas or the best equipment...WRONG.. Everyone has to start somewhere! 

  I'm starting from the very bottom with hopes that this will be a very fun experience. I have brought lighting and now I am waiting to buy my camera. I figure I'll start my channel off with a dorm haul, Vlog move in day, my first college party and a dorm room tour. A lot of college things will be edited and published first because this will be around the time I buy my computer and camera. I am mentally trying to prepare myself to stay committed to doing YouTube while I'm at school. I'm a very social person so I plan to be active on campus, focused on academics, and working. I have already put in my planner the times I need to set aside for editing and recording in my planner. I have many really good ideas in store for you all. I will be using my social media platform to help promote my channel ( @Lanaylovee) as well as my blog, I also plan to blog more often in school. Hopefully my life will be a little more interesting LOL! 

 If any one reading this wants to start a YouTube, I advice you to start now and don't let so much time pass by like I did. I was really scared that people might not like me, I didn't have a computer or camera... Many excuses but I really could've made it happen...JUST DO IT.

Stay Tuned to ALittleBitAboutLanayLovee

July 23, 2016

It's 12:30 am....WOW is July 23 finally over. Today was very tough. I use tough because I had several up and down moments.

 I'll start by saying ( to my young viewers) transitioning from high school to college is no easy task. EVERYTHING is in order for me, I literally made sure I was on my A game senior year so I wouldn't be a stressed out college student.  Yet, STILL I am here.  This is showing me money is not everything. I have a full ride to Michigan state university and I am highly blessed that I will not have to take out loans for school. With that all said I am still not necessarily "happy". Life takes me through loops and NO I'm not perfect . I do not want to sound greedy to my viewers or even weak. Dealing with a job and disrespect from employers, a different type of family who never had to do a transition like this , people who don't understand me, being single& letting go of someone who you once loved, handeling social media and expectations of my blog/viewers, and still trying to be sane and at peace. ITS. HARD! I remember thinking my first heart break was hard, like no that was not nothing compared to this feeling. Oh my g*ddddd. Hmmmm, I can smell overwhelmed right now. That's why I don't blog as much as I would like too, sometimes I feel like my 24 hours are harder than others. I know college will  be my start of a new life mentally, physically, and financially. I am starting my Vlog and YouTube channel. So I will have more to juggle with in my 24 hours. I just feel like when you're young and life is really being thrown on your shoulders all while still telling your self " YOU'RE YOUNG"... It is very stressful. 

TIPS to myself : Pray, use journal, confine in a good friend or mate, be calm...It'll work out.....

Let's try again tomorrow 

Ideas

I would love for my viewers to comment ideas they want me to blog about...

Follow me on Instagram @Lanaylovee

The senior year transition

 My senior year is being wrapped up and I am kind of fragile on the fact that I will be going to college in less than three months. High school was actually cool for me. I had some really great educators, learned some cool things, and most importantly met some awesome people. 

First day of senior year 2016 at Cass Technical High School. Left-right; Alonna, Dana, Jada, Lanay, Micah.

I was so bummed about leaving high school and the thought of leaving my daily schedule shocked me. In high school I was very active and I maintained a B average on every report card. Something I was active in was fashion club, DECA, BPA, newspaper, and mentoring.I think being active made my social skills very flexible. I was always trying new things like for example my junior year I danced in the band and although I ended up quitting I met some great people.

  I would over all say high school was great! If I could give any tips about my senior year I would say. 

1. Apple early. Know your deadline and be on top of all dates

2. Find a prom date early. Everyone is going to start to get taken very fast when December/January hits.

3.Pick easy teachers. Don't get to senior year and think you'll randomly become Einstein your chances are limited to 0.

4.Love your parents and their rules because you won't have to listen to them once/if you move away after graduation.

5. Don't be in a rush to do what the older people are doing.You are literally around the corner from adult hood.

6.Keep your options open on what college you want to attend.

7. You can go into college undecided if you feel like you don't know what you want to be. ITS OKAY TO NOT ME OKAY

8. Get recommendation earlier emailed ( NOT A PDF) so you can change them around when you need them.

9. Don't trip on friends, you'll probably never see those people ever again.

Why are you a virgin?

A Virgin is a person who has never had sexual intercourse.

I could blame my selfishness or the way I watched women be degraded mentally and physically by men or the way my girl in the seventh grade was rapped and birthed a baby boy who'll grow up with no father or the woman who lives a lonely life because she received aids from her down low gay ex husband....or that I haven't met any one who truly knows my worth. The average African American woman in America has lost her virginity at the age of sixteen. Clearly, I have beat this statistic by far...Not intentionally though. 

  Love is cool and all.....I've just never been given it. Think about every couple you know. As I kicked it with my older homies they brought a valid point up; how many truly happy couple do you know? One in a million. I know ONE truly happy married couple....I'm not talking money and riches I'm talking about true love. It's not found for fun or on accident.... I am not saying I'm ready for something very uncommon to happen or rain down on me but I believe in my odds. I'd rather die with faith rather then love with doubts/regrets. I have faith that the good will be attracted to me before or after marriege, it'll be out of faith to believe and courage to wait.

   The genuine and authentic love I give was never given back to me. I am a young woman so I have much time to feel the real thing, but speaking from experiencing I know I haven't yet. I probably thought I did when I was in my young kiddy relationships..it was all child's play. When you're young you're easily intimidated at the thoughts of love and sex...I'm no saint I used to have many times when I wanted to have sex, when I had a boyfriend many years ago, but before I did there was always the truth in the back of my head knowing I wasn't ready. At eighteen, I see I was not missing out on much. I probably missed a few good in the moment feelings but I also missed a heart break and boys who I would've invintually would've grown away from. I see this all in hindsight. I didn't miss out on much by not having sex in grade school.

  I'm not in a rush to be entitled to any one. I know how my love works, Actually I don't know how love works but I know how lust looks. When I love someone I am ready to go to war for them and due for them. Until I feel that I never want to feel entitled to you sexually if I am not spiritually. I never let anyone rush me with anything— I love my motion.

 Sex comes with entitlement. Anyone you have sex with.... You'll have a picture of their body in your head and the music their bodies make. You have entered their temple and they've given you visual and action. Sex is spiritual and a delight according to New York Blogger. It's a bliss of joy and a physical connection to women. Why would I ever give you my joy and physical energy if I don't vibe with you mentally?

*Dont get my wrong it may be beautiful to you but I can't speak from experience. LOL

  I am a beautiful, light tan, smart woman... People expect off hand looking at me "She is not a virgin" just because the way my body is fully formed. People may think MANY things about you but know who you are. Now that I'm older I see that no one really cares. In high school people actually care about "body counts"....but in the real world none cares. It's your business! Have sex with a million men, that is your body!

  Virgin or not respect your temple. Stay true & confident in your sexual discipline. Ultimately that's the only thing NO ONE can take away from you. Live it your way.

A man needs a woman

  A man needs a woman.

From watching his mother sing and get dressed,

to watching her iron his Sundays best.

A man needs a woman.

The way his father never cherished women,

or the way his uncle loved his wife.

A man needs a woman.

Seeing his mother struggle to feed his siblings,

and hustling to try and help her.

A man needs a woman.

Studying his mothers mistakes,

and teaching his sisters how to pave a better way.

A man needs a woman.

To help understand the way we think,

evaluating a woman.

A man needs a woman.

A breath of relief,

when he finally tells his mother "This woman is for me."

A man need a woman

To kiss his heels after a very long day,

or to pick up his pieces of his mistakes.

A man need a woman.

To bear his child,

to raise his seed with.

A man needs a woman.

Many speculations occur,

he finds answers in his woman

A man needs a woman.

To love him

like the world will never.

A man needs a woman.

 

"It's not JUST High School"

  It's not just high school. Honestly, as I matriculate into college I see how important my high school career actually was. Have you ever had millions in scholarships thrown at you? Have you ever stole your mothers car? Have you ever cheated on a test just to find out that you're smarter than the person you are cheating off of? Have you lost all of your friends and made completely new ones? Have you ever got bullied?

WELCOME TO HIGH SCHOOL!

Here are some tips I would have given myself had I known before what I know now.

1. No one cares. The shirt that you wear on the first day, the expensive hair style you get, and the dirty shoes you wore every day freshman year, NO ONE will care about them when senior year roles around. Do not invest in what other people think.
2. Get in the habit. Get in the habit of doing the right thing. If you don't make the right habits, you'll become your wrong decisions.
3. Tutoring is cool. I used to feel so dumb when I told my older friends that I needed tutoring. I was so afraid that they would judge me. If you need help, seek it, the resources are there.
4. Upperclassman are smart. You are now in school with developed men and I know your heart skips a beat when you smell his Versace cologne.You are now in school with fully developed girls and I know her boobs are overwhelming.  Focus on yourself and not the older people. Leave seniors alone, Plus his girlfriend is the captain of the swim team and her boyfriend is playing college football.
5. Remember your motive. You are in high school to achieve a diploma not a status. Most people are going to be focused on everything but their diploma. Don't be that student, be the smartest. Do the best in everything you do in high school.
6. Personal Bank account. Look at your education as an investment. Invest in your future everyday. Each time you do good on a quiz or test put a penny in your account. Each time you do bad with draw twenty pennies. This will teach you to push harder because you do not want to be empty. This is a very good tactic and will teach you self perseverance. If you have over come some tough times give yourself credit, you owe yourself.
7. Don't take it personal. If someone approaches you the wrong way or speaks to you disrespectful do not over react. Most of the time it is something very personal wrong with them, don't take it personal. If your mom is angry and seems to be mad at you, she may have had a bad day at work, give her space. 
8. Foundation. Believe it or not freshman year is the most important. Do your very best and set your standard at your high school. Everything this year counts.
9. Begin with the end in mind. Make a vision board of where you want to be in four years. Although, plans do change, JUST DO IT! It doesn't hurt until you try. Plan to join clubs and receive over an 3.0 gpa throughout college. Remember that you want to join the navy and the requirements that are needed. Save up and be secure for anythings that may occur.
10. Just do it. If you want to try out for the debate team, do it. If you want a boyfriend, get one. If you want to write a book and get it published, JUST DO IT. You will never have to go through life with regrets because you followed your hearts desires.
11. Put first things FIRST! You have a test next week, so do your homework. St-uuuuuuuudy. You have priorities. Don't be the procrastinator who jams everything in one night and goes to school with the largest cup of coffee and a half done project. Be the prioritizer, who makes a list and lives a stress free life. Get a planner, that is the recipe to success in any level of education.
12. Skipping. Do not skip. The day you skip will be the day that teacher who never shows up, SHOWED UP. Just go to class. Plus if you sit in the lunch room you will get fat
13. Make relationships. Be nice because being mean is not fun. Be friends with everyone and keep your options open because most of the time your middle school friends will have different interest in high school. The person you never spoke to may have a dad who owns the local ice cream shop that you want to work at.
14. The geeks. I bet you are thinking big glasses and giant teeth. Geeks are smart people? Be a geek. When senior year arrives you'll realize how the geek is actually cute and has a full ride to Harvard. Cool john? Oh he is still going to be working at the gym shoe store next fall. Don't be sleeping on smart people.
15. Live like tomorrow is not promised.After you have did whatis expected,Do more. Have fun and experience life. Think win-WIN.Life is an all you can eat buffet so take all that free experience and flourish.

These are a few thing's I wish I knew before I got into high school. 

Good Luck!

eccentricDanny

         An artist should be two things talented and soulfully driven. Detroit has established many artist of the century and many who are upcoming.
   
           Daniel Geanes also known as eccentricDanny has become recognized for his unique artistic skills. He was born and raised in Detroit and has a warm spot in his heart for the city of Detroit. Mr.Geanes is currently working as the leading designer for the company , and movement, based in Detroit, Michigan called Enjoy Detroit, SBOY LLC. Enjoy Detroit was established Summer of 2012. They are a for-profit organization that focuses on Social problems; Hopefully later becoming social entrepreneurs.They have made it a big necessity to explore Youth in the city of Detroit by donating and mentoring boys and girls.

" Helping the community by donating, feeding homeless, visiting schools, and hosting fun event for the youth has always apart of our Vision for Enjoy Detroit, SBOY LLC." The owner of the company explained during an interview, David Woods .

Michigan Chronicle, 40 under 40 ceremony

   Before the business was establish, Danny Geanes entered a contest competing with any different artist from around the country. Recognized by the stylish brand Adidas and was offered a road trip to Los Angeles and VIP tickets to the VMA awards. The bulk of his art work is targeted towards various emotions. It can be reasonably inferred that every piece designed by Danny tells a specific story.

He tends to tell stilled stories in visual images and in . He yearns to stay active with customers. Most people find it so unique how he questions customers with questions like, "How do you feel when viewing this piece?" or "What origin could be depicted by the theme of my work?". "Understanding the viewers perception of the art has always been a key factor to my artwork" Danny explains.

Live Canvas

The art is sometimes judged because of the way women are exploited or contradicted. He loves the art of the women body and uses it as his canvases in most of his art show cases.At his studio, Located in Downtown, Detroit, he is usually found painting women or show casing his art to potential customers or those who want to experience creativity on the live canvases. The art that he produces is neither bias nor bland, he concentrates specifically on catching peoples eyes in a dramatic fashion. His art can be found at the art studio in Detroit, Enjoy Detroit store ( Oak Park, Michigan), or at his Venting in the elevator Showcases. Venting in the elevator begun winter 2016. He invited all artist, photographers, vocalist, poets, etc., to come support his event and part take in an eventful night. He explained, " I love watching the ballet dancers move, I'm happy to say it is my favorite form of art.

Venting In the Elevator, February 2016,  Taylor Boyd Photography

" I am easily influenced by modern artist , The illustrious,  Pablo Picasso, Andy Warhol, Michael Angelo and present artist Banksy, Kevin A. Williams, Sandra Chevrier, and Tristan Eaton." Danny explained as if he was overly enlightened by their skills. He only wishes to become as good as some of the artist mentioned and plans on excelling if he continues what he loves; Art. While he is very proficient in painting, He has only been painting for a little over a year. Starting off with just a pencil and paper then venturing into digital graphics later on. Now proficient in using water color, graphite, graffiti, acrylic painting, wall murals, logo designing, and mixed media. He uses nudity in some pieces to show vulnerability. Using blood and gore to display agony and pain. Different colors represent different emotions and meanings: Pop colors to show beauty and Light positively. Using color study and his personal relationships with the colors and color balances to construct each and every piece. Danny explains, "I try to make every piece abstract representational whereas the viewer can have his/her own perception on the piece as it holds weight and depth as well as different emotions and meanings to unique perspectives and thoughts .Danny has found his true calling, and as he often mentioned in our interview " Art was my calling, It is what I was put on earth to show case." 

"Do you consider yourself an entrepreneur?" I questioned. Danny replied " In 2012, I was called by God. I quit my job and followed my dreams.I have been self-employed ever since. I had to do something I loved and sometimes it was very tough but I know have a crazy amount of clientele. I'm learning to grow, my passion is what drives me and I have no doubt that God isn't paving my paths."  After hearing him explain how important it is to follow your dreams, I was comfortably inspired. 

Suicidal Notes

Dancing with the Devil

March 28, 2016...My first time watching Greys Anatomy

   Today was immaculate, because I woke up healthy and my body was one-hundred percent energized. Yeah, energized enough to clean up the whole kitchen from all the Easter guest and get bleach on my favorite new BCBG night gown. After that I laid in my bed and there was this show on with all of these doctors. There was a case of a few people who had been in a tragic Fire and the hospital was very hectic. There was a woman who had minor burns, A man suffering from 3rd degree burns, a man with an knife in his chest and a fire man who nearly lost his life saving them. The woman had seemed just fine but as the day went on the women ended up dying. Every doctor working urgent care that night had to be investigated because no one could understand why this woman died out of all the horrible cases. When everyone told their story, They started to see how every single detail of that day mattered and that any wrong decision could cause them to loose there jobs.The lady who died was being examined and she was so startled by the man who was getting rolled in, She scared her doctor. The doctor returned to examine her and as soon as she reached her neck, The staff yelled "Help us!", so she ran to the next man who was suffering from third degree burns and he was obviously in dying pain. The woman remained perfectly calm and patient with the doctors. When the doctor who was assigned this patient was being evaluated the chief asked "Did you check her throat for ash.", and she cried "No, The pressure, they screamed my name and she was fine and I but then and It....". It caused a woman to loose her life and I dried my eyes because I had several tears rolling down my pale face...
     Thirty minutes of me watching Greys Anatomy had taught me a valuable lesson. Sometimes its not the obvious. Things are not going to always jump out in your face and slap you. Life is a mystery and one wrong mistake can change peoples live forever...

"I Saw what I Saw"

My College Decision

When you think about deciding college, I always became very overwhelmed. I'm not sure why, My high school is pretty "College Prep". They have colleges coming to visit us daily and we are constantly in seminars. I remember sending my first college application to Clark Atlanta University. All of my friends had visited the HBCU's and I just liked the way Atlanta sounded. Welp, around December when life started erupting everyone changed their minds and I was still riding on my HBCU experience and how I was so ready for a fresh start in a new city. Lets rewind for a moment, I applied for so many schools. I had it set in my head that the more universities I applied to the better of a students i'd be. Waving around my acceptance letters and what not, When in actuality NO ONE CARES. It's all about you. 

*Back to my Obsession with HBCU's*

Did I mention I'd be a first generation college student? So no one in my family actually understood the rush and difference between an HBCU and a PWI. When I told my family that I was 100% positive that I was packing my bags and moving to Atlanta this summer- THEY HAD A COW! I was absolutely so confused as to why everyone felt like I couldn't handle a new state or that a new state couldn't handle me. I love trying new things, new food, new everything! I could start a new project everyday and I probably wont get finished but It was something new that meant something to me! The alumni come back from HBCUs with pride and great character. And that's all the experience I wanted when moving away to college. 

..............................Dreams, Money, Can buy you...................

I had to reevaluate my life. I'm a senior from Detroit, Michigan with a 2.8 gpa. Although I had been admitted to every school I applied to, I had to see where was I financially. Which school would give me a great experience and not have my at twenty-one years old with plenty loans. That led me to me decision to choose Michigan State University! I have fallen in love with Michigan State over the weeks, and I am very confident in my decision. Most people didn't get accepted but I DID! With a very reasonable scholarship and I won't have to take out any loans! I can still visit my friends at HBCUs but unfortunately I will not be in attendance. I plan on studying Mass Communications and having a concentration on Fashion Merchandising or Political Science. MSU is in the top ten for schools of Journalism and it's definitely going to work at my advantage. And to answer many speculations, " No, I didn't chose my university based on social status, football teams, or parties, Simply from my peer judgement and level of opportunities with my degree. Plus, I have to the best roomie EVER! See you on campus and I plan to start my Vlog then... #Msu20 #GoGreen

Pictures Posted below

Do not get ruined

Here to mold a broken heart or tell you how to notice you aren't broken.

He loved you , complete. Love was so real no need to compete. He spoke soft in your ear, And you knew the world disappeared. He showed you off and like a moth to a flame, your panties are off. He spoke the majic words and on the third day he fucked you now you wide open. You feeling good now, and he feeling better. He loves your ass but that wasn't the only reason he loved you. He just was so amused at the way you walked away with confidence. You made him reach a peak that was so high and when you left he got to watch your fat ass walk away. He talked to you long and honest. He helped you, when you knew you didn't need a man. He took you from the world, and he finally called you his girl. His girl was enough for you so you made a gap between who you were and his girl. In between loving you and him loving you you lost yourself. You for got how strong you were. So accustomed to his love, his touch, his words. You forgot about you. You studied him and the only thing about his class was that no matter how hard you studied you were lost. You lost you, in the mist of studying someone else. No matter how hard you studied him you never felt like you knew him. He introduced you to his mother and after a while you became cool with his family. They were welcoming and everyone knew you as his girl. You settled because your life wouldn't  be perfect unless that was your title. Now it's month six and your happy. Your telling your girls about how it's love and he gone always be yours regardless. He giving you chills and he pay the bills. 

 Until one day he starts acting different. He got you thinking he stressed out by work. He gets mean and acts as if he is bored. You become nicer and try to cater to his anger but you don't realize he got his own shit going on. You spent so much time trying to make him happy you forgot about you. You begged him not to go but he leaves. He leaves your life. Just like that your memories, your love was gone. It had been two years since you started loving him and stopped loving you. He is gone. You gotta let it go. You search for answers and you can't find any. You ask God how could he possibly stop loving you. Constantly doubting yourself and every time you look in the mirror you saw him. You figure if he Can love you that hard then hurt you. Everyone could. This results in you thinking every man is bad. Did you know the average person meets there soul mate after meeting over 100 different guys. You can't not expect love to cater to yourself when you can't. You can't love someone harder than yourself. You cant give your all when you don't know your all. You can't be ruined. 

Revaluate your Motive

The woman who saw him struggling, hurt, and unmotivated— Deserves him. Anyone can be down for someone and fall in love. Any one can like him; sexually and physically. Know the reason you are in someone's life and your intentions. Are you growing? Does she/he motivate you? Can you trust your partner? All of these things matter. You may be with a person for all the wrong reasons. Only hurting yourself at the end. You're pushing yourself farther away from the person you belong to and being selfish of what the other person deserves. Revaluation is a simple task when knowing what makes you happy and what you settle for.

A slumber party👯😁

  Today, January 9 ,2016, is my little cousin Qarlis slumber party celebration for her Sixth birthday. I will be giving useful tips through out today and explaining in great detail how extrodinary this night is for us. 

  In a world where most young people throw celebrations at chuckle cheese or the park, there is a slumber party. My Aunty decided to make the girls know there worth as young ladies. We did chocolate facials, manicures/pedicures, hair, and Make up. We also enjoyed a long night of sweet treats and karaoke. They dressed up in princess costumes and danced a long night. It was truly a day to remember.

TIPS-

*Pizza is our FAVORITE

*Chocalate facials are yummy

*DIY ARE THE WAY FOR A SLEEP OVER

*Cocunut oil and Brown sugar makes the best foot scrub

*Girls ONLY

*You should have at least 3 adults at a party with more than 5 young ladies

*Fruit and Veggies are good!

Thoughts on Fasting| PART ONE

 Am I really not going to eat unhealthy? Only drink water? And stay away from my social life for a COMPLETE 21 DAYS?

  I'm even doubting myself right now but this is perfectly Normal when doing a yearly cleanse. Last Year, I gave up all junk food. ( that's it) This year, on thee other hand, I saw this post on Instagram about fasting and doing it for God. ( LINK BELOW). I have severe circumstances and I'm trying to hold it down. I have even talked my close friends and a cousin of mine to complete this with me. In order to keep my social media updated on my blog I'm having a close friend post on my Instagram. Instagram will probably be the hardest for me to stay away from. I love getting on there and that's why I decided to leave it alone. Usually on my spare time I'll update a new selfie, post a quote, or like a few pictures. Now I'm substituting that for my blog, reading , school, and my advancement in the real world.

This morning, as I ate my brown sugar oatmeal in complete silence, I thought. How about I tweet about my dream last night and then it dawned on me that I have no friends if I have to jump to Twitter  with little thoughts. Then I thought more about how I need to be more social and explore my many options but that just ended with me asking myself how to be social with out SOCIAL MEDIA. 

  So right now at 8pm I have just watched the movie "Joy", which was GREAT. I feel así así ( so so), today was alright and very relaxing for me. 

Understanding your struggle

 Everyone has a struggle through out life may it have been your parents divorcing or your case of type one diabetes. Some struggle young but often adults struggle because of poor decisions. He/She who struggles is not on the path to failure but success. 

  I'm a strong believer in things happening for a soul purpose. We often  question our beliefs and religious leaders because we don't understand why things happen and why they occurred in this order. I believe that everything that you're struggling through will only get better if you except your differences and push forward. A person who accepts their struggle and settles with it is not progressing. A person who doesn't accept the struggle and fight the battle are only creating a more chaotic life. I remember trying to convince my good friend that the reason she hadn't made any progress and it felt like her struggle was lingering was because she simply couldn't find the good. The old saying " There is good in all evil",Unkown, sticks with me.  

    Take this example why don't you—"I am struggling trying to study and type papers and I sometimes think I can't focus proficiently. I want to get over this and become better but I like to do my papers last minute and my study habits are very poor. My grades are starting to reflect my irresponsible descisions. Why am I struggling?"

  You must try to work with your struggle in order to prosper at the end. In this case you may simply need to prioritize and not categorize yourself as an under achiever. Do your paper ahead of time so if you do get writer block you can take a few hours to prioritize. Take time to get tutoring or give your self enough flexibility to teach yourself on your spare time. Everything starts with you and your desire to overcome your struggles. 

The struggle is only valuable after you can over come. 

  One of thee most successful women in the world once struggled. In her early years, she struggled with being abondoned and being molested. As she grew older she never gave up hope for herself and her father found her and took his daughter into his wing. She then started to prosper at the young age of 17. Ms. Oprah Winfrey, had an exceptionally challenging childhood. Despite being sexually assaulted she still had the courage to join beauty pageants. This is a great example of someone who turned the odds around. Ms.Winfrey also received a Full ride to Thee Tennessee State University with a full ride tuition and where she earned a degree in Communications and liberal arts. After her college experience her career took off and she is a true believer that humble beginnings result in success. 

   All of the major somebody's have struggled. You just have to have faith in your struggle that it will work out to your very best advantage 

 -LanayLove 1/4/2015