Zion "HIM"

     Soulful and filled with power. I want to learn about him. I want to learn the beautiful reflection of his grace. I want him smart, charismatic, and gregarious. I want him black and strong.  We will walk Manhattan and the blue birds will try to fly close to me and he will gaurd me. I want him strong and positive. I will not smile until I  meet him. He will bring me a bright light and Make my heart smile. I want butterfly's and I want him to touch me internally. He will be apart of my heart. He will understand my thoughts and when confused he will make sure he can surely understand. He will be aspired about how innovative I think, and This will be mutual. He will be so confident about me, even more confident than myself. He will love me for me, accepting my past, and never judging me. He will not steal my heart he will heal it. He will crown me and treat me like a queen and I won't expect it. He will amaze me daily because how could he be so impeccable to me? We shall share a thrown one day and make the world better. Rich or poor we will have each other, and that's enough motivation to keep us goal oriented. Removing my stress, he will heal my soul. He will be willing to listen to me and correct my wrongs. When down I will remember him. He will squeeze me tight and he will not want to let go. I will feel his heart speeding with my soul. They are not racing they are flying high. They are happy and traveling through my body to him. I want him to dance with me and make me want to explore the things I thought didn't fit me. We will have a strong relationship with God and I'll remain a God fearing woman.He will open my mind. I want to explore his mind and his thoughts often. He will prove me that they were wrong!! Love does exist. Love does love somebody, love LOVES me. I love him for him because everything that made him makes him everything for me! My body will be his temple and he won't ask why it didn't work out with every one else because he knows I'm his now. I will love him, his thoughts, his past/future, good/bad, and happy/sad... I will love his family- If he shall bless me with the intent to extent. My wisdom will be his favorite characteristic about me. The positive spirit he needs will be me. I will fill him with the intangible love. I will constantly remind him of our future.....He will only need a few words from me to be inspired.I will love my Black Soldier in a world of people who don't love him..
 I will take him as is, and I pray he forever remains the same. I will love him, beyond words.

  Shall my Zion be the seed of my apple tree and set my soul completely free..

  -Her

LADIES NIGHT!

   LADIES!

    

       How about a night all about you?

No one can make you happier than yourself.

So celebrate yourself today.

This will be a budget day just for you and your happiness.

Its Very Simple and inexpensive.

Silence your phone

Watch your favorite movie's.

Go out and buy a lot of your favorite food/snack.

Make a play list of all of your favorite music.

Give yourself a facial.

Try on your favorite clothing.

Style your in A way that satisfies you.

....

Dedicate A date celebrating you.

Paula Patton/My Favorite Person/Most Beautiful woman in the world

Surviving High School

   What is being a teen? What did/does it mean to you?
   Before you know it you will be taking senior pictures and taking cap and gown measurements. What shoes Lacy wore to the ninth grade snow coming or who she dated will no longer matter to you. The clique that betrayed your loyalty are now intimidating the next freshmen. The seniors you used to look up to have now graduated and they no longer matter. How boring you dressed freshman year? yeah no one cares because they are looking for your next move. Back when everyone laughed because you walked to school and now you're driving, yeah that's Seventeen. Not having a prom date because every guy is either a jerk or taken, YEAP, This is  seventeen..Your high school crush is probably graduated and off to college or married by now *Rolls Eyes*. They say Ladies mature twice as fast as guys so maybe that's why I can't see myself dating anyone in school, but I matured twice as fast as those Ladies meaning that I am FOUR years ahead of the average high school guy. So basically I would be better off in college right now and trust me if I could leave today, I would! Unfortunately,I go to one of the top schools so they don't let you graduate early unless you're Einstein and I'm d*mn sure not. I like to think of high school as a pre-chapter for me. It's the prime years for many but wasn't much for me. I didn't do great, I didn't get a foreign whip, I didn't have a high school sweet heart,I'm not a stoner/alcoholic or anything spectacular.Nothing major happened especially not with my body because I've been developed since the sixth grade. My love for hair extensions did grow, my hair grew, my attitude got better, my talents developed, and my thoughts became a bit wiser. I now love make up and Fashion; These are my passion. I think in High school I found the person that is going to prepare me for the person I am meant to be.
  What advice would you give to a pre-teen scared of becoming a teen?
Stay focused and have less fun. I didn't party as much as average but It was enough for me.I didn't want to go to every party every weekend and be that girl. Please do no be that girl! As a senior the chances of people remembering that you stayed home are way less likely then the girl who was drunk at every party freshman year. There is nothing wrong with blending in the back as a underclassmen in High School. I remember my friend Shavonna, ( If you're reading this don't kill me lol ", didn't get dressed up at all when we were freshman. I used to want to walk past the senior boys and sit with them at lunch and my girl Shavonna just wanted to blend in with the wall. And when we were younger I used to think how lameeeee, until our report cards came out and my girl had a 4.0. I just use that example of why you should remain focused on the real goal- Graduating top of your class.Both of use are beautiful and on our ways to success but i'm the average student at my high school and the person who was focused will be top of your class. Your grades will show. Even if you cheat your whole way through high school, it will show in college. There is no easy way out of this, so I beg you, PLEASE, stay focused and stay away from boys because I hear the guys in college are ten times better. *Wink Wink*

( Here a few good links to get you started Sister/brother )
Sparknotes
Designer Planners
7 ways of becoming a high effective teen

( PLEASEEEEEEEEE READ THIS BOOK, I READ IT SUMMER OF 2012 AND IT REALLY HELPED ME TRANSITION.)

.....And who told you that it was selfish to love yourself ?

 In a World....High School...Society....Generation of half naked women who who are overly exposed,

There was Her.
The coolest thing is to remain your mystery.

At first she was too young, then she was Broken, Later healed and found peace, and now a 18 year old Virgin.

I like my pace, and the way I learn, and how I am figuring out who I am.

I don't down my peers who have casual sex or look down at them,

because your body is your temple do as you please.

I am that girl who has the highest standard and I think I understand love like no other.

I couldn't let different souls into mine but I don't like the sound of that.

My Jamaican hips and my African breast all are inherited and It didn't take a man or a pill to form them.

I'm authentic.

Those who are my age who let different men in them are hurting, 

and we are too young to have our happiness dependent on a man's love.

Time passes and between focusing on goals and progressing,

She never had Sex.

Love is not sex, and I can make a great man love me with out sex.

 At the highest point of loving him I will show the man who truly

deserves me how much I love him, 

By letting him enter me after he has entered a healed heart.

I got a heavy hurt, A messy soul, a reckless mind, 

and they adore the way  I carry myself.

They watch my big hips, brown sugar skin and my thick chocolate hair.

They stare but can't touch, So intimidated and words are provoked.

We are all self cautious , I am just the first to admit it.

My decision to love myself before loving someone else has made me unique.

I have no shame, at all, but I celebrate how it is possible. 

Every man may want me but non can claim to have met me.
Strong women intimidate boys & Amaze men.

I'm very conservative with myself.

I made myself vulnerable for a long time, in my past life.

I lusted. I loved things.I learned. I experienced. I grew.

I am the poetry among women who are learning the alphabet.

In a world that is over exposed, there is a woman who is fully clothed.

I am regular ole Erykah Badu in a world full of Bad Bitches.

Letter to LanayLove

Dear A Little Bit of LanayLove,

   Lady, You do not owe the world. You didn't play the hand you were dealt. You changed your cards.You can let the dream killers kill your self esteem, Or  blow off the steam to straighten your self and your dreams. You should continue to walk tall and love your self like no one else ever could do. I bet with your attitude- you easily connect with the greatest people and I bet with your smile you calm the saddest soul. I hope you keep up with your positive vibes because people often ask about you.
   Remember the people who you thought you couldn't live with out? They still ask about you. Everyone who hurt you in your journey , yeah they still think about you. Sometimes they think about how you're doing or even how you progressed into such a great person with out them. They contemplate on contacting you but they see how thriving you are and they don't want to mess up the vibrant new you. You should thank them, or even congratulate them for being apart of a journey so Impeccable. I bet you wonder why those you loved left? Or you wonder why you couldn't be good enough? Well it turns out you lost them to become good enough and everything you thought you weren't made you who you are. Now that you love yourself so much to live with out them...They want you! So won't you raise your glass on you.
  Later on in your journey you will  understand everything that is happening now. I can assure that you will be happy and see the meaning of every tribulation. The new people who you meet will not understand why you value your life so much, but you will show them the meaning of life. The old friends who helped you and stayed in your life during your journey will often celebrate your accomplishments with you. Do not rush this overcoming either because it will come when you're ready. When you're so sad and nearly ready to give up your happiness will meet you. and then lady you will be at peace.

Your's Truly,


Hope, Peace, and Happiness

High Fashion Society

  As president and the founder things can become complicated. High Fashion Society is a fashion movement that I started at my High School. We recently had an audition for models for our fashion show. Our show will be hosted in March or 2016. We have raised about five thousand and things are really great. We have chosen twenty-six models and they will have training several times before the show is hosted. Our fashion show will cast old school and new school trends. Our show will be held in our high school gymnasium and we plan to transform the gym and take our audience back to the future. Stay Tuned!

Thursday

Don't let the world make you hard...

  As a young woman, I have struggled numerous times with feeling like I was not good enough. Not having a Mother to play a Major roll in my life or not having much support at all mentally played a big role in my challenges, But I have overcome. I am now realizing ,as I transition into adulthood, that my struggles may not have played the antagonist but the hero. In most cases we hear unfortunate stories about adults who have blamed their parents situations on their lack of success. This is not going to be me. Every person living and breathing has a true purpose, and that is to for fill destiny. My destiny has been established and in order for me to find happiness I am mastering the idea of letting go. Many thoughts may go through your head and you wonder, “Why me?”. This battle was meant for you and you will overcome.

  High School has played a major role in my character as well. I have always been a privileged person when it came to my image. I have beautiful hair, I stand five feet-seven inches from the ground, and I have perfect teeth . Being pressured into beauty pageants, older men always acknowledging me, or even being judged off of the way certain things fit on me; can pressure a hopeless child into the wrong destiny. Situations taught me that I don’t have to be model if that’s not what makes me happy. I do not have to talk to older men to make me feel loved. Nor do I have to change the way I dress because I am full figured or because I can not keep up to a expectation that my peers hold. People  judge me and say that  I look “Too good, or too Boigie to converse with”, because of the way I appear. They don’t know that I grew up very insecure or that I grew up with out a mother to nurture me and teach me about the young men that admire me. I never let this hinder me, and I always use it as a tool to build character. “Even Oprah Winfrey continually searches for deeper understanding of who she is and where she belongs in this world.”, noted on Oprah.About.Com.

   

    We tend to shift the way we look towards who is watching; Caring too much about the wrong things. We enjoy having young men who adore us when our focus is completely adrift. I was never focused on men because they will always be around, but the chance to receive an education may not be. Michelle Obama spoke with “Let Girls Learn” an initiative group to empower girls and women through education. The campaign keeps referencing the number 62 million. It’s the number of girls, around the world, who are not able to receive an education. She explained her experiences with men and how education was always her main focus. Explaining that an educated woman is far wiser than a woman with no education. Also, how the right man will find you on the path to receiving your diploma. Obama stressed, “If I had worried about who liked me or who thought I was cute when I was your age, I wouldn’t be married to the President of the United States today.” Discussing with teens how the relationships and friendships you chose to condone in should not affect how you perform academically. “There is no boy at this age that is cute enough or interesting enough to stop you from getting your education.” Obama mentioned. Attending a school with over two thousand students can make things very competitive; financially and academically. Over 70% of girls age 15 to 17 avoid normal daily activities, such as attending school, when they feel bad about their looks. As young women we should know that confidence is imperative. We are just as good as the next young woman walking past us daily. Instead of discussing our issues with confidence we are mean and envious of the next young lady.

   Usually when feeling down I tune into my many motivational novels. My all time favorite that I’ve read thus far was by Hill Harper, “Letters To My sister”, A life changing book. Mr.Harper stressed the concept of following true destiny ,  “Change will come-and it will be in stages-and one day, everywhere you go,people will notice different,positive shifts in who you are vs. who you were.” Manifesting your destiny may mean that you can’t do or have certain things that benefit the woman you are meant to be. This is all meant for you, and the best way to prepare is to work on your inner beauty.

Golden Daze

I am wise and gentle.

I own the sweetest heart and wear the kindest hands.

My hair is the Pacific ocean and my curves are the surrounding continents.

My high cheek bones represent clouds and the sky's, well when it rains it pours out of my optic nerve.

On my stomach lays Africa, and right up under it is the core where you can enter the world.

My cocoons are in my brain and they wait patiently to fly into the world through my teeth.

My seasons come and go monthly in order for me to , one day, plant a seed inside of me.

Summer is my favorite because my skin turns a golden brown like a roasted nutt.

I visit a far far place often in order to stay sane.

This place is dark, lonely, and on top of a ice glacier.

I'll climb for days to reach that peace but after a while I have to go back into space.

In space we don't breath and we like to turn each others worlds around.

I always play with neptune and when I hit my foot on the ice lands and now I can barely walk.

Put you first in your prime years, Men will always be around.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/michelle-obama-dropped-some-wisdom-every-young-girl-should-hear_560c00afe4b0af3706decbf5

I just want to thank you...

     I am Thankful! What are you thankful for? I'm thankful for my beautiful soul, my forgiving spirit, and every flaw that comes with it. I am thankful for my high cheek bones, my tall bones, and my big thighs. I am thankful for my mature voice, good attitude, and my indecisive way of thinking. I am thankful for my Mother and Father who conceived me, but most of all thankful for my grandmother who has raised me. I am thankful for the angels god have placed especially to assist me through my journey.I am thankful for every step that had brought me here today. I am thankful for my freedom and how far my   race has come as a culture. I am thankful for the words of encouragement and discouragement. I am thankful for the support and help of those who truly love me. I am thankful for the people who have hurt me, because you put a move on my heart. I am thankful for rejection and hurt because It has made me stronger. I am thankful for those who didn't think I was needed because I have mastered the idea of letting people go. I'm thankful for my healthy body and my good contiaus that makes sure I dont us drugs or poison myself with alcohol. I am thankful for those who truly love me for me, through thick and thin. I am thankful for my strong legs that make me walk the footsteps to destiny. I am thankful for my beating heart. I am thankful for my working blood, and the system that cleanses me every month so that one day I can birth a healthy baby to call my own. I am thankful for the opportunity to change the world. I am thankful for my eyes that have exposed me to the real world. I am thankful for my 20/20 vision because I was once blured until obctacles taught me how to view things clear. I am Thankful!

Where is the weekend?

  It is November 24,2015 and I woke up at 6 AM tired. I often wake up angry and mad. My grandma is real loud and in the morning she tends to scream which is not the way I would like to start a productive day, But hey *Shurgs* that's just the way she operates. I can block out a lot and I have a skill for things in that nature.
     Last night I spent all night doing unproductive things like searching YouTube, folding clothes, and not doing my homework.  I have a math test in a few hours and I hold a 89% in that class so I need to bring my A game today. Although I'm a senior I feel like I've been having "Senorities" for the last few years. My focus just isn't always there. But back to this math test, Math always was cool to me, I love how it isn't easy and it provides me with a challenge. I should've studied, geesh I SHOULD HAVE STUDIED. No how about every Tuesday we have to dress business in my entrepreneur class and my teacher is so tedious. One time, My hair wasn't combed how she like it so I got a ZERO. Like are you serious? If you don't wear heels you will receive a ZERO! Talk about punctual. In hindsight I really couldn't dress professionally but now I'm fly with it. I saved up all summer for a rainy day and now ,every so often, I purchase suits and nice shiny pearls. School is a breeze as a senior with a 3.5 GPA and I'm hoping that by January I can receive my first 4.0 here at Cass Tech. It's hard though, and I have to balance academics, personal life, AND all of the that I run.
   It's time for me to go now and adventure through this day. Now my school has 6 long tall floors and I'm aiding at the moment in our library but in about 5 minutes I'll go from the 6th floor to the 3rd floor in my Platen leather pumps. It's usually super crowded in here and filled with thousands of crazy children. I used to be insecure about being 5'10 with my high heels but now I like it. I almost love wearing my heels on Tuesdays.

10:43 AM, Of course my English teacher is late. She is so easy going, actually I lied she is not easy at all. I like her though because she has the best interest in us. She was raised in Detroit and struggled just like us so I think she understands. PLUS, she was my English teacher in the 10th grade and she is over our broadcast journalist program—in which I love. She was opened many opportunities for a high school teacher. Just yesterday we were on Channel 4 representing Cass Tech. GO CT!! Well...we are watching this movie "Beowulf", I've already lost interest. I'm sitting alone...oh and she has just walked in. She hates phone so....gracias.

So it's 6:04 PM and my friends and I are on the way up to University of Michigan. I'm a aspiring Communications major. Next year I'll be at Michigan State and i don't know I'm just getting "Prepared". Michigan State University- School of Communication. Being in Newspaper is really helping me gear towards my decision to pursue Broadcasting. Well now we are on the free way on the way to interview some University of Michigan Football players for an upcoming article.
Cass Tech Football Hopefully this year I'll choose exactly what I want to major. Cass tech has opened so many opportunities and i don't know things have been good. Back to this free way ride, I'm tiredddddd.

11:19 and finally I'm in my BED! Today was great. It started off shaky but I've tackled another great one. ( LOL Look at me using football terms now, I'm getting sports fever I swear.) We met up with a few great guys who currently play for UofM. They were getting ready for their game against OSU, and I think its going to be a great game. After we were done we headed over to Red Robins to grab a meal and the Waitress was SO ignorant. Yikes, and I am not leaving that link below because I wouldn't recommend it to my worse enemy. In all today was great.....MICHIGAN vs. Ohio State University

Comment and let me know a bit about your Twisty Tuesday


.................below I'll post links to a few things I mentioned above.


Business Attire
Business Pumps

Letting Go

I probably will read this to myself a trillion times, and with hope you'll just have to read it once and change your life.

I am happy and angry. I am kind and mean. Let me just.....Provide some Hindsight.

You just CAN NOT PLEASE EVERYONE! I mean you can gone ahead and try to please everyone but I am not wasting my precious time, any longer. For what? To be hurt, confused, and feeling unfortunate? If you can't see me for me you shouldn't see me at all. Actually if I could disappear out of your world I WOULD! See I've spent a long time trying to understand why people can't understand me. I sure can answer that question now, "Fuck Them". They don't see out of my brown eyes and they damn sure don't walk with my big hips. I wanted to make everyone happy and see everyone smile. The pressure was so tough as a teenager because we want to be what people see us as.Wise man once told me, "Lanaylove, you don't need nobody! Only person you can be accountable for is you because that's the one thing that can't take". This was the day I put me, in front of them, and saw her. I'll be respectful and loving because that's how my geniune heart was designed. But at the end of the day the real questions are..

• Who are you to judge me?
• Who died and made you king of anything?
• Why should I change me for people who don't love me?
• Why conduct myself in a way that is beneath me to retain your interest?

I soon learned that it would be impossible for me to try to fit in with such weak people. When I was younger they wanted me sound more.."white" because of my diverse skin tone. Being pressured into fitting in can make a person feel lonely. I started to feel like an outcast and I questioned myself. I started buying expensive clothes with small earnings..I started buying long weave and straightening my curls..I replaced all that made me unique for everything that makes you all the same.

 Insecurites are REAL! Did you hear me? You never know what someone is going through. So for you to feel like your comment is so GODLY that you just had to speal it is disgusting. So in order to let go and forgive yourself for falling victim...You, RIGHT NOW, Need to cleanse. If you're the smartest, most confident,in the room, walk away. If you're the lowest, saddest , because of your peers, walk away. It takes nothing but a few steps to walk away from what is hinduring you. They can't hold you back forever.......So stop kissing ass, You don't have to do this...You're better than that!

But only if you're ready to let it go.

-Lanaylove

My first kiss went A little like this....

      Yikes!! "Do I look good? Is my hair nice? Is he coming?", I'd say insecurely. I can remember being the tallest sixth grader on earth, well at least that's what I thought way back when. The pressure of being pretty was so not what I was thinking about I just knew beautiful couldn't fit in my vocabulary. I was HUGE, no seriously I was 5'7 in the sixth grade. See now at seventeen 5'7 is perfect but back then if the world would have ended I would've blamed it on my big bones. Looking back I was pretty ignorant about it, and the only people who bullied me about it are the guys who admire me now. Except this one guy, and I couldn't quite figure out why. He was all cool and to himself, and Me? I was loud and punctual. In fact I could go socialize and entertain all day but for him he would just blend into the back. I would get all shy around him and run. He could walk right up to me and have a full conversation while his friends tussled and fought after school like wild monkeys.  While we sat, waiting  patiently for our tired parents who took their slow time to come retrieve their energized kids. Boy,oh boy, when I got home the only thing I could talk about was him and my Nana would always say, "Girl, you better stay away from those boys!" I'd smile as I completed my homework with my stomach completely filled with butterflies. Anxious for the next day, I'd lay out my cute oxford pleated skirt and my bright yellow polo school shirt. Charter schools can be so tedious and everyone had to look the same; Not I! I wore my long socks with my two pressed pig tales because my big cousin from Arizona was in town and she loved doing my thick-long hair.
   This day was going to be different and I felt it in my soul. It was a Friday, my hair was done up all nice, our cheerleader sleep over was later that night, and my grandma was finally letting me join my team! I pranced around the halls smiling and carrying on. I hadn't saw my guy friend all day and I figured after a while he might not have attended school or that maybe he was avoiding me. I continued on with the day and right before the day ended I saw him. Probably would've ran, like usual, but this time I sat in the hallway and waited for him to acknowledge me before he could see that I saw him. And before I knew it he was right in front of me jocking with his childish buddy and what not. I looked up at them, "whats so funny little boys?" and they laughed at me. What else could I do? I started laughing as well. His friend walked away and said, "Bet you wont kiss her."At this point I'm all confused and in the mind I AM LIVID because why would he want to kiss me? Why would I kiss you? Do people really kiss their boyfriends?Kissing is nasty!... That boy bended over, grabbed my blushing checks, and pecked my virgin lips.


I decided to blog to you "My first kiss went a little like this"...To show my young audience that young love is OKAY! (Now I am not encouraging any one to conduct their selves in a disorderly manner or live off of the choices I have made.)